I noticed this morning that Gary Vaynerchuk (@garyvee) posted a link on Twitter to his first-ever Wine Library TV episode (Feb. 2006). Since he announced his “retirement” earlier this week, I decided to take a quick trip down Memory Lane.

I admit, I got a kick out of it. But, it also struck a chord with me. More on that in a minute.

To be honest, as soon as the video started to play, it triggered something in my brain that recalled the old Highlights Magazine activities I used to do as a kid - which one of these things is not like the other?

Here are the things I noticed immediately:

Episode 1 - February 2006
 

• It’s dark - Hey, it was Episode 1 - no lights yet.
• “Cool camera” from Best Buy - It’s a far cry from the HD digital video we saw in later episodes. Has that VHS warble…
• No fancy intro - No music. No graphics. Just Gary and a little bit of text.
• The walls are bare - No Jets swag, no chalkboard, no nothing.
• Less intimate - Looks like (Chris) Mott was shooting from the back wall of the office. Later episodes were shot tighter on Gary and the wines, making it feel more personal.
• Both sleeves are down - Gary’s known for, among many things, rocking the one-sleeve-up, one-sleeve-down look.
• Lame spit bucket - Gary upgraded to metal in Episode 76, a Jets-themed pail in Episode 136, then alternated a couple others until finally settling in with his cherished Jets helmet.
• A whole lot less “thunder” - Gary is very conservative and almost “corporate” in Episode 1, even introducing himself as “Director of Operations” instead of the now famous “I am your host…”
• He uses “real” flavor descriptions - Gary ultimately moved to more colorful descriptions like “racquetball,” “Big League Chew,” “sweaty sock,” and “sheep butt,” which skyrocketed his “uniqueness quotient.”

Episode 1,000 - March 2011
 

However, the progression from Episode 1 to Episode 1000 serves to illustrate why Gary has been so successful. The way I see it, the five biggest drivers of his success have been:

• Vision - From the very beginning, Gary knew he wanted to “change the wine world.” Though time, technology, tactics, etc. have changed, his vision has not. 
• Tenacity - Also known as “hustle.” Gary works until his “eyes bleed.” He has a tireless work ethic. “It’s not enough. We always want to do more… We’re going to get better. We’re going to keep pushing it.” - Gary in Episode 1.
• Sincerity - Gary genuinely cares about what he does and the people he works with and serves, and it comes across in every interaction (including in person, to which I can personally attest).
• Chops - He knows his stuff… cold.
• Gratitude - At the end of the first episode, Gary ended with the words “Thanks so much.” Nine hundred ninety-nine episodes later, he still signed off with words of sincere gratitude and appreciation: “Thank you forever… I love you.” Heck, he even wrote a book about it - The Thank You Economy (affiliate link).

I firmly believe that the development of these five traits will help anyone who wants to be successful in business - and life - get there. Which ones do you have nailed? Which ones do you need to work on? Are there any I missed?

Most people want a big title. It signifies their arrival on the business scene. It boosts their ego. It changes how others “see” them.

I was reminded through an experience yesterday, how much a title can actually be more of an obstacle than an asset.

And that is the problem.

The trouble with a title is that it immediately throws up boundaries and limitations. Instead of being fully present and focused on the individual and what he or she has to offer, your brain is busy adjusting expectations based on the person’s title (label).

One CEO requested branding & positioning documentation from the Marketing Department in preparation for an important meeting with an outside consulting group who was brought in to advise on an important project. One of the employees presented the information (which the CEO conceded was right on the mark), but because the individual carried a title that didn’t specifically (or implicitly) indicate expertise in “branding”, the CEO responded with a request for someone “better suited” to present the information.

You see, in the CEOs mind, the employee’s title disqualified him from being able to provide excellent information, or to add value. Discounting ideas, information, or feedback simply based on a person’s title significantly limits the potential of any organization. This is an especially important reality for leaders to pay attention to.

When titles become earplugs, the casualties include creativity, innovation, efficiency and growth.

How do you prevent yourself from falling prey to the tendency to let someone’s title influence your ability or willingness to listen openly, honestly, diligently and authentically to the person across from you?

Most of us have heard the expression, “There’s no ‘I’ in team.”

In other words, if one person tries to focus all the attention on himself, it disrupts the chemistry of the ‘team.’ This self-centered approach often impedes success.

As in sports, the same holds true in business - and in life.

And, it’s not just about putting yourself first in a selfish way. It’s about inserting yourself into the central context of all your daily experiences.

For example, if someone were to be critical of a project you were working on, or the way you run your business, would you instantly become defensive? Or, would you try to take a step back and see if there is something buried inside the criticism that you can use to improve?

When you take things personally, you’re being self-centered. You’re also closing yourself off to finding opportunities to grow and improve. 

There is only a one letter difference between “bitter” and “better.” Not coincidentally, the letter “I” is what separates the two.

So, the next time someone decides to criticize - use it as an opportunity to get BETTER instead of BITTER.

Today was a bit of a ‘perfect storm’ in terms of finding inspiration for this post.

Today marks Day One of Jeff Pulver’s #140edu Conference in NYC - an event devoted to exploring the effects of the real-time web on education. The generally shared view among participants is that the real-time web should create profound changes in the way we think about what students and teachers can do, create and communicate, as well as how and why they do so.

Then, I stumbled upon a 2007 Selling Power interview of Seth Godin where he talks about “the mindset of a winner.”

There was one statement in particular that resonated with me and bears repeating.

“The big win is when you refuse to settle for average or mediocre.”

The challenge is, each of us is bombarded every day at every turn with messages - spoken or otherwise - that encourage us to be average.

Radio and TV commercials, billboards, in-store signage, magazine ads, web banners, emails, friends and family members all try to convince us that we should strive to “fit in.” In other words, be like everyone else. “Be average.”

Think about it: what are trends? They are nothing more than a mass of people all striving to be the same - a reflection of a desire to be doing, making, buying, wearing the same thing as the person next to you.

So, what happens when we start to stray from average?

First, you get noticed. Second, people start talking about you (in the form criticism or praise).

Let’s look at education as an example. We live in a world where standardized tests and “tradition” are the norm. The problem (as I see it) is that technology has/is changing the world in which we live, yet our educational system seems to want to ignore that fact and wrap “education” up in a nice, neat box and tie it with a bow.

When educators buck the “average educational experience” by introducing cell phones, podcasts, Skype conferencing and collaboration into the classroom experience, people revolt. They warn of the dangers. They shout from their rooftops that these things have “no place in the classroom.” Why? Because it doesn’t “fit in” with their view of (average) education.

It’s no different with fashion, art, business.

Here’s the truth: the most successful people and businesses are the ones who leapfrog being average to become different, to become remarkable.

So, what are you doing now - in life or in business - to propel yourself beyond being average and toward becoming remarkable?

I sat down for coffee with a mentor of mine the other morning to seek advice and insight about a situation that’s been challenging me for a while.

I really enjoyed our time together, and our conversation certainly provided food for thought, and gave me some clarity about what to do next. I felt really good. I was ready to take action.

Our meeting got me to thinking about mentoring relationships, their importance to personal and professional growth, and specifically, what makes these relationships thrive. Clearly a great (and willing) mentor is critical, but the mentee makes all the difference.

I came up with Three Keys To Being A Great Mentee:

1. Respect - Mentors, by definition, are established in their careers and have high demands on their time. Therefore, you must be considerate of their time. Return phone calls and emails promptly. When setting meetings, arrive early and stop immediately after the allotted time is up. Let your mentor suggest extending the meeting.
2. Listen, listen, listen - Remember that when you meet with your mentor, you are there to learn. The only way to learn is to listen. Listen to your mentor, take diligent notes, ask clarifying questions, and listen some more.
3. Act - Once you’ve received advice and counsel from your mentor, it is imperative that you act on his/her suggestions. If you are unable to implement them, let your mentor know why (during your next conversation), but do not ignore them. No mentor will continue to offer advice that falls on deaf ears and is not acted upon or, at the very least, considerately acknowledged; it’s a waste of everyone’s time. Moreover, share your successes with your mentor - press/media coverage, milestones achieved, awards received. Much of the reward for a mentor is seeing your mentee succeed as a result of your counsel.

What did I miss? Have you had successful mentoring relationships? To what do you attribute that success? Or, if you’ve had one that failed, why? Let me know.